In Case You Hadn't Heard, Cynthia Nixon's a Big Lesbian

I wonder if Cynthia Nixon is tired of talking about her lesbian partner while promoting the Sex & The City movie. I know I'm a week late in critiquing this, but I was pretty annoyed that New York Times Magazine interviewer Deborah Solomon.:

#1: that she reduced Sex & the City to "about four single women devoted to designer shoes and other forms of self-gratification," and

#2: devoted five questions to asking about Nixon's lesbian partner, which is a considerable part of the interview****.

Is it knee-jerky of me to be annoyed by how tied-in to the film promotion the discussion of Nixon's partner is? All celebs' romantic lives are up for grabs, but I'm sensitive to the issues surrounding this particular type of relationship. In my New York City bubble, I want homosexuality to be a "whatever" afterthought -- not "gossip." Maybe it doesn't get to that place with out a bunch of questions in the NYT Magazine to an actress who's open to talking about it. I identify as straight, so I don't know if this is an area where I'm welcome to mouth in. But here goes anyway:

On the one hand, the media blitz of Sex & the City is a huge visibility opportunity for people in committed same-sex relationship. Nixon seems pretty clearly okay with that, because I've seen her talking about it on Oprah and now in the Times mag.

But on the other hand, Nixon's partner is really butch -- much more butch than Rosie O'Donnell or Ellen De Generes -- and America likes its lesbians through the male gaze, 17-years-old and h-o-t-t. I worry about that. Nixon offers up details about her partner freely, so she's in control of that, but at what point does a tabloid TV show spot, or a a gossip item, mentioning Nixon and her partner become gratuitous gawking?

Gratuitous gawking is part of the entertainment industry -- I realize that. A celeb's personal lives is grist for the journo-mill -- and I've written about that stuff myself. But there's this part of me that feels really protective of this actress, who I really like and admire, and don't want the increased visibility of her same-sex partnership just to be gawked at and ridiculed.

So my question is: how do we increase visibility but do it in a respectful way?

***I realize her caveat at the end of the interview -- "INTERVIEW CONDUCTED, CONDENSED AND EDITED BY DEBORAH SOLOMON" -- means she could have just edited the piece to break up a monologue by Nixon with five questions so the text ran more smoothly on the page, but it doesn't read that way -- it reads like this was actually their conversation.